Mondays Course in Miracles


Before you take action ask yourself, 
"Is this the most loving thing I could do?"
"Am I doing this with love?"
"What would love do?"

You are love! 

Treat yourself lovingly in all that you do!

Blessings
Virginia

Come join my community. Sign up is on the top right! My December free coaching gifts have filled up. I am however still doing my daily drawings and I will put you on the waiting list. Christmas lasts all year!

Teenagers kinda rock. Thank you Christmas

Years and years ago a dear friend told me to watch for Christmas.

I finally got it!

 Christmas happens in moments.

Christmas is never about the presents or the giving.

Christmas is about the receiving.

God gives!

Today in the midst of an angry teenager vs mom showdown I got Christmas.

That angry teen helped someone with no applause. He shovelled a neighbors driveway .

Feeling proud.

Single mommahood is only for the brave.

Blessed God made me brave.








Single Mom Thriving:Your Feelings Don't Define You.

The  'experts' of the interwebs claim single moms are consumed with sadness and loneliness during the holidays.

Please don't believe them.  Don't make the media's expectation your reality.

Yes!  Strong feelings come up this time of year for everyone.

They are only feelings. All feelings come and go. We just need to sit with the feeling without judging it. Then  it will pass in less than 2 minutes.

When we deny it, fight it, or judge it, the feeling stays.

Last week it hit me that my daughter in college would only be home for 12 days during her winter break. This is also a year my children spend Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with their dad.  A big whirl of sadness landed inside of me.

Immediately I berated myself with nasty self talk,

       "She is doing really amazingly cool things in between semesters. You should be happy for her."
        "You have been splitting Chistmases with their dad since forever. Get over it."
        "It is Christmas time. Be joyful."

The whirl of sadness didn't go away. It got worse. I started feeling victimized,sorry for myself , cranky and irritable.

Luckily I was able to pull myself back. I stopped and let the feeling of sadness be there.

I miss my daughter.

I didn't judge myself or stuff down the sad and the missing because I was "supposed' to be happy. I simply felt it.

 And just like that it floated on by.

A few moments of sadness does NOT mean I am a single mom consumed with sadness.

A few moments of sadness means I am a human.

The same goes with feeling lonely. Everyone on the planet feels lonely sometimes.

Loneliness has nothing to do with being a single mom.

Loneliness is a result of you not knowing you.

Robert Holden often says that if something is missing in your life it is probably you.

When I feel lonely I simply ask myself what I need.

The answer is usually time with myself.

Sometimes after time with myself it means reaching out to a friend. Sometimes time with myself is all it takes to make the loneliness float by.

Sadness and loneliness are not single mom attributes.

Sadness and loneliness just may be a part of the Christmas experience.

When we feel whatever comes up, Love comes come back.

Single moms rock!

Blessings,

Virginia


















How Well Do You Receive?

Giving and receiving are part of the same energy. One cannot exist without the other. We need to strive for an equal balance of both. This time of year that balance can be tricky.

Enjoy,



 Receive the gifts that are here.

Blessings,

Virginia

Journal Writing Prompts: 25 Questions to Ask Yourself.




I encourage all of my clients to keep a journal. Many get stuck because they don't know what to write. So here is a list of qustions to ask yourself next time you grab a notebook and a pen.


1.What do you want?

2.What do you really really want?

3.Why do you want it?

4.If you had this thing how would you feel?

5.What is the most loving thing someone has done for you?What is the most loving thing you have done for someone else?

6. What would be a perfect day for you? Describe it using all of your senses.

7.Is there something you might regret not doing by the end of your life?

8.What were you like as a small child?

9.What are some of your favorite childhood memories?

10.If you had a magic wand, what would you magically change in your life?

11.What is something you do everyday?

12.What would you tell your ten year younger self?

13.What is an important lesson you have learned?

14.What is a blessing you received from your mother?

15.What is a blessing you received from your father?

16.Who do you admire and why?

17.Imagine yourself next year at this time, what does your life look like?

18.Five years from now?

19.Ten years from now?

20.What did you want to grow up to be when you were a child?

21.What was your first best friend like?

22. Who was your favorite teacher and why?

23. What is amazing in your life right now?

24. What are 100 things in your life that you are grateful for?

25. If you could only use positive attributes, how would you describe yourself?


What questions would you ask yourself? Let me know in the comments.

Blessings,
Virginia

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Mondays Course In Miracles; Five Easy Ways to Be The Light



We are entering into the darkest days of the year. 
It is also the happiest time of the year.
Or so they say.
Not totally sure who the 'they' are. 
Yet I am sure of this:
You carry the light. And your light matters!
The world needs your light. 
Here are some ideas to shine.

Smile at everyone you meet. 
Make eye contact as you smile.
While getting ready for your day think of someone and send them a prayer.
Do something special for the ones you share your day to day with. The day to day loves are usually the ones we forget.
Do something for you! You matter. Loving you is the key to loving everyone.

Only light is real.

Blessings,
Virginia


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Mondays Course In Miracles

Sunday's Blessings. Here is my prayer

I got a cold.

I felt like crap.

 I received the amazing gifts of a sleep, chicken noodlen soup and  two  days of laying low.

Then I remembered.

I once could not receive this.

I remember being quite sick with two babes to care for. I put up gates turned on a movie and grabbed a bucket.

I remember being sick with  three babes to care for.  From the couch I told my kids how to make dinner. We all slept in the living room.

Here is my prayer.

Dear Every Single Mom on the planet.

You got thts! Your kids are blessed. You and they will do amazing things! God loves you!





  


Your Body Knows. Listen

I could feel it coming on.

A scratchy throat.

A few too many sneezes.

A headache.

The exhaustion.

Normally I would just push through.

Today I tuned in.

My body screamed rest.

So I did.

I took a three plus hour nap.

Our bodies know.  We just have to listen.

Toddlers know this.

When did we adults become so unaware of what our bodies need?

Probably the time we were seeking someone else's approval.

Blessings,
 Virginia
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Feng Shui Friday:Finally Tackling The One Thing!

Yesterday as I was reaching for something in my office closet a box filled with pictures toppled to the floor.

I quickly grabbed them all up. Shoved them back into the box. Put the box back on the shelf and walked away.

But there was a nudge. A nudge that said," Go through them Gin Gin"

Any nudge that calls me by Dad's pet name for me makes me act.

I wrote a while back about my hoarding of pictures. You can read it here.

Yes! Some clutter is good but I really wanted to get a hold on all of these pictures.

Soo.. I decided to make them into Christmas presents. I know. I probably should have decided that back in October. I only have a few short weeks.

Regardless I began.

Beginning is all we can do.

I went through the box. I made piles.


 I marvelled at the life my children and I created. I felt happy

I only threw this much away.


I became glad that my dad too made Christmas a time to share his hoarding of pictures. Me as a newborn.



I still have to go through these to make my Christmas presents.

Clearing out is fun!

Blessings!
Virginia

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Single Mom Thriving; Ten Ways NOT to Overspend This Holiday Season



One year it took me months to pay off the Christmas I put on a credit card. Those months of scrimping just to pay off things my children rarely even used totally bummed me out. I vowed never to do it again.

Let me be clear here. My overspending wasn't because my children were begging for stuff. My overspending wasn't because my children needed all of those things.

I overspent in an atttempt to make myself feel good.

I  believed that the more presents under the tree equated to my success as a single mom.

Since that year, I have done these things to curb my overspending.

1. Before any Christmas shopping, I check in with myself. I make lists of everything I have done for and given to my children throughout the year.
     Single mom sister with a list like that one, we could just skip the entire shopping. HA!


2.  I  ask my children what they remember about last Christmas.  They never ever remember the presents.
      I once asked if they remembered what they received from Santa. The answers were vague.

                                     The presents aren't the gifts of Christmas.

3. I make a budget. I put the allocated cash in an envelope. When the cash is gone. I am done.
          I am not against using credit cards. I just don't trust myself at Christmas.

4. Before I buy anything I ask if the recipient will love it?  And will I love giving it to him or her?
          Giving and receiving are the same.

5. I like giving experiences. Each year I give each of my children a coupon for a lunch with mom.
          As a single mom one on one time with your children is a gift for both of you.

6. I shop at thrift stores,consignment shops, Goodwill and Salvation Army.
         I once filled an entire dress up chest for a mere few dollars. My children used it for years!

7. I like to be creative. One year I gave my teenagers the toy they loved best when they were toddlers.           My store was the box in the basement. They loved it.

8. I always give my children things they need. Santa Claus is helping mom out when he gives children socks, underwear and school supplies.

9. I make things for teachers, coaches, mail carriers, friends and extended family.

10.  I remind myself... as I shop... as I wrap... as I put under the tree..as they unwrap....

                           Christmas has been happening all year in this home.
     
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I'm giving gifts every day in December!

Many blessings,
Virginia